Wednesday, June 17, 2009

"Bountiful, Plentiful, and Adequate."

These are the names my grandpa jokingly gave my babies during one of our last phone conversations. He was driving through Bountiful after one of his hospital visits when I called to tell them the news. He was always good for a laugh, and he was joking until the end. For instance, during one of the daily phone calls to my mom, (she spent several weeks helping take care of him in Logan during his last days) she was in his room doing this or that, so I routinely asked how he was. She had the phone on speaker, and he said that he was doing fine, and had a great time celebrating his birthday yesterday. This happened to be one of my sickest days, so I hadn't remembered. I jumped and gave him a hearty "Happy Birthday!" To which he said sarcastically, "Thanks for remembering", with a little laugh that followed I'm sure. He would've laughed heartily as he used to, if he'd had the strength. But the fact that he said he was "fine" when I know he probably wasn't, says so much about him. He always saw the glass as overflowing.
My Grandpa Scott passed away on Saturday June 6 2009, just a couple of days before I had scheduled a visit. I got the news while in the Colorado Rockies with my in-laws where there was hardly any cell phone signal. I guess my Dad was inspired to call at the exact right moment so I could find out. He had been suffering from cancer for the past 2 years or so, and it had worsened significantly in the last few months. I remember when I heard that he was given an estimated 2-5 years left to live. It was hard news to take, especially when it was about someone who I love and admire so much. It always seemed like my grandpa would live forever with his ultra-healthy lifestyle, and great physical shape. But, other plans were in the works. I do feel incredibly blessed to happen to be in Utah the exact week that the funeral was taking place. I would've been so sad to have missed it. Which likely would've happened if it was at any other time.

It was one of those funerals where you laugh while you're crying, and the memories came flooding back. My grandpa certainly gave all of his grandchildren a childhood to remember. He gave us a one dollar bill every time we saw him, a birthday check in the amount of our age every year without fail (keep in mind, he has a LOT of grandchildren), random trips to the store where he would declare that we could pick out anything we wanted, exciting Christmas gifts (one that comes to mind was a high powered microscope that I cherished), a prize cabinet in his house that we got to choose from every time we would visit, a pack of clove flavored gum, or endless cans of pop whenever we wanted, and there aren't too many kids that can say that their grandpa took them for rides in his very own little airplane. If I was without sunglasses, he had a spare, if I didn't know the time, he'd find a watch for me. He was a true magician in my eyes, and I couldn't be more proud to call him my grandpa.
I have so many special memories, but I'll only name a couple:

Years ago, when I was probably 10 or so, they were visiting for the 4th of July I think. (It could've been another summer holiday, but it's doesn't really matter.) Most of the family, including Grandma, had gone to run, or support the runners, in an annual race. I was feeling under the weather, and remember lying on the floor in the living room. Grandpa was reading the paper as usual, and then folded it up and asked if I would like to go for a ride on the new tandem bike that my parents had just bought. Feeling like fresh air would do me good, I jumped up. He led the way, and we rode that bike all over. I was amazed when we ended up at the grocery store that was about 5 miles away. As a kid, that distance seemed like quite a feat on a bike, since I had only been there by car. He let me pick out a doughnut and chocolate milk, and he got some breakfast for himself. We rode to the park where there was a large pond with a trail around it and through the rest of the park. We rode until we found a picnic table, and ate together. I remember as we rode, that I would sometimes close my eyes since he was doing the steering, and just take deep breaths as the wind blew on my face. All the feeling of sickness I had that morning magically disappeared while I was on the road with him. How sweet of him to take a young grandchild on such an adventure just for the fun of it. He never said no to an adventure.

When I decided to attend USU after high school, I was pretty excited for the changes that were to take place. That excitement quickly turned to depression for some reason, as I realized that this college experience wasn't quite what I had expected. I would cry every day wondering why I was so unhappy and felt completely alone. One day as I was overlooking the valley, I spotted part of my Grandparents' house next to the Logan River. It immediately hit me that I wasn't so alone there after all. I don't know why I hadn't thought of it before. I didn't have a car yet, but my mom told my grandma of my struggles, and she offered to come pick me up and take me to dinner with them at a fun restaurant in the canyon. From that point on, I was with them at least every other day for dinner out or in, food network watching, playing Upwords or other games (I won once, which is kind of a miracle when playing with geniuses like my grandpa), to work out in their exercise room, do laundry, or even to sleep there on the weekend so I didn't have to feel cramped in my dorm all the time. It felt like a warm haven. Once I was talking to them about how my roommates were probably so sick of my taking up the tv with all the food network I was watching, and by the time I left that night, grandpa had a little spare tv, and a set of headphones for me to use as long as I'd like. I felt on top of the world with the freedom of my own television. Another time when I was there for dinner, Grandpa had made us a special stir fry that I remember loving. As he served my plate, he said kind of quietly, "Emeril's got nothin' on me." I'd rather eat his food than Emeril's any day. Since that short, but very influential time when I lived in Logan, I usually refer to my grandparents as my college buddies, though I did make a few good friends while I was there. When I decided to go to culinary school, they were so excited for me, and Grandpa even offered to drive the cross country trip with me, saying it would be fun. I didn't take him up on that, feeling like I was already a burden being with them as much as I was, but I'm sure we would've made quite a few good memories on that voyage.

One more. At my wedding dinner, guests were invited to take the mic and say a few words about either of us. I'm am thanking the heavens that KC's friend Nate has the entire thing on video because he and my grandma both stood up, when I really didn't expect them to. Especially Grandpa who seems to be more of a listener when there is a crowd. I remember when he stood up, I was amazed and honored, and hung on to every word.

Oh, there is so much to say, but I have to stop somewhere. I am so glad he started a blog. It was always such a learning experience when I read what he had to say. I kept a few posts unread so I could have something to read when he passed on. I guess I'll have to get to those now. He was always so delighted to get comments, and would even email a little thank you note for them occasionally. And it's no surprise that his final post was about hope. He was a man of great faith, a true example to me during difficult times. While I've lived far away, we've kept quite a little email correspondence going and I've loved reading through all those. I sent an actual letter a while ago after I got to see them in January. He wrote an email in return and my grandma informed me that he taped this picture I sent of KC, him, and me to the lamp on him desk. She wanted to put it somewhere else where she could see it more, but he wanted it right where he put it. He led an incredible life. My mom wrote the life sketch that she read at the funeral, and I'm going to post it as soon as she emails it to me. It's so amazing, all that he's accomplished.

I was able to spend a lot of time with my beautiful grandma while in Utah since she was staying with my parents post-funeral. She is so brave. I can't believe how she keeps a smile on her face. She constantly had her journal out writing quotes and memories of grandpa, sometimes weeping as she did. But she has such a great way of mourning in happiness. Even as a widow, she dresses in all the colors of the rainbow, and puts a flower in her gorgeous curly hair. She even wore red shoes to the funeral. She is a great example as well. She has heartily volunteered to help with the triplets when they are born, and I couldn't be happier to welcome her into my home and learn from her.

I have another post in the works about my entire trip out west, but this has been on my mind so much, that I couldn't let another day got by without writing it down. I miss you and love you everyday Grandpa. Take care of my little ones until they are ready for me. I will be sure to tell them everything there is to know about you. (For more great pictures, go here.)

6 comments:

Woods said...

Oh Em, I am so sorry. I loved your grandpa. I remember how generous and kind he was. He always made us laugh. We took a few different trips up to their house remember? One of the trips was the one when you were swinging on a branch in the back yard and it broke and you went floating down the river. I'm not sure if it was a river but it sure seemed like one at the time. You have so many amazing memories. He was a good guy to know.

Chad and Bree Fowles said...

I agree with everything you've said about our sweet grandpa. He was such a wonderful man and I really miss him. I am so grateful we all have so many many memories most our very own of spending time with him. Thanks for sharing!

Corinne said...

Friend, I am so sorry for your loss - truly.

Tracie Frost said...

Beautiful tribute for a wonderful man. I love the names he picked for your babies. I am sorry for your loss.

Cami said...

Thank you for writing these thoughts down. I always thought it was great that you got to spend that time with them in Logan.

Michelle and Cisco said...

I thought i would let you know that I ended up getting his obituary at work. And tell your mom it was one of those perfect obituaries I always hope for that has all the information I needed. I found his wife on the system, kids, and even his parents!! I enjoyed reading about your grandpa.