Whistle while you work

There's nothing like a stomach bug to get you into the cleaning mood. I always feel like my house is a ticking time bomb until I have disinfected to my satisfaction. So since it seems I have dodged a bullet (I'm still crossing my fingers and praying to the heavens), I woke up ready, and energized to get the place spic and span. I donned my rubber gloves and by 9 am the kitchen, bathroom, and living room were scrubbed down with a combination of Lysol, alcohol wipes, and a whole cocktail of other cleaning supplies. I'm sure others can relate to my post-sickness ocd cleaning habits. I have also started two of three loads of laundry. KC slept in a little, but I almost wanted to kick him out of bed to get the "sick" sheets off the bed and straight into the washer. Eventually, he got up, and I did.

I also did some mind and body cleaning (I've been driving myself crazy wondering if I'm sick, asking what I can do for KC, making sure everything was cleaned, etc. I needed some relaxation) by working out while reading my wonderful book, stretching well, and letting myself have a nice long shower. I have packed KC a mild lunch, and he will leave for work soon. I'm looking forward to some fresh air while doing some unnecessary errands just to get out for a bit. I can't wait to be in the beautiful sunshine.

We got it too.

So my hopes and dreams of us not getting the horrible stomach bug going around were shattered. KC woke up in the wee hours of the morning, around 3:30, and tossed and turned until you-know-what. But only a couple trips to the bathroom and he was able to get some rest. He seems to be resting well and doing much better now. And since it seems inevitable that I'm next, we are both on the brat diet today (to produce minimal damage should any be present). It seems most of my friends around here have had it, sometimes twice. He must've caught it from one of them. Anyway, we can't point any fingers, since there really is no one to blame except bad luck and reality, and we can look on the bright side. I get my husband here with me on this holiday that he would normally have to work. Plus, I had already planned for this day to be a relaxing one, and to get some good head-way on my book. I have no guilt, whatsoever, that we are both still in our pajamas and plan to keep in that way.

L. is for the way you look at me. . .

We had a grand Valentiney weekend. I love it on Saturday. Then you have an excuse to celebrate all weekend long. (And although, I kind of hate Valentine's Day, or the forcing of love via commercialized and cliche gifts rather, it is nice to have an excuse to do things a little differently than any other day.) So our weekend went as follows.

We had plans to go to a fun place in DC on Friday. ( We were babysitting on Saturday but before you start feeling sorry for us, Jan asked me which night we'd rather have. Yes, she let us choose, and with my minor crowd phobia, I chose Friday, in hopes to avoid them.) But places still seemed to be very booked for reservations, so instead of braving the crowds and traffic that were probably present where we had planned on going, I told KC I just wanted to go out for one of my favorite things. Nachos! Yes, I had a big plate of them all to myself, though I hardly made a dent. I was in Heaven. Can you tell? (KC wasn't really sad, we just liked the shape of the chips and how big they were.) And isn't that what Valentine's day is about? Doing what makes you happy? There is a time and a place for a nice, romantic, candle-lit dinner, and I just wasn't feeling like it at that moment. But I was sitting by my love, with my nachos, so it was all good. We planned on seeing Coraline 3-D, but it was sold out until 10:15. I'd be snoozing for sure. So we said hi to the Turpins, since we were in the neighborhood, went home, ate our chocolate covered strawberries for dessert and fell asleep to a movie cuddled up on the couch. A great night with my love.

So the fun continues on Saturday. Since I was babysitting later on, I decided to make them a little Valentine of my own. Chocolate cupcakes with pink buttercream seemed fitting. KC came home on Friday with a "candy tower" he had won at work. The gummy hearts were a perfect garnish for the cupcakes. I decided to make enough for all my young women too. KC did some church business in the morning, but came home a beautiful bouquet of roses for me. What a sweetie. It was a lovely day, and it was especially nice to have KC's sweet guitar playing in the background as I was baking. It was also nice to eat as much candy as I felt like eating all day for this specific occasion. We got some chores done around the house, the kind of gift that I love to get, and just sort of lounged.

It's so nice to have KC come when we babysit at night. He is so great with the kids and indulged them in many games of hide-n-seek, which they seemed to think was the best thing every. They worship KC. Iris has quite the crush. The kids were just in bed when we were surprised by them coming home only a couple hours after they left. They were too tired, just like us, to hit a late movie and decided to just come home early. So we had the night free after all.
It was a nice weekend, and mostly nice because we just spent it together, with only each other's happiness in mind. There are a million things I could list about what I love about him, and about us together, but I'll just say that KC is so perfect for me.Happy V-Day everyone.

Utah hair, here I come.

I will revisit that disturbing news below at a later date when I have come to grips with reality.

But right now, for your enjoyment and pleasure, I want to introduce you to "Bumpits". That's right, your answer to flat hair. Casually watching TV just now, we were graced by this infomercial. And to tell you the truth, I was quiet horrified. I mean, do people really need THAT much volume? It's outrageous. I'm pretty sure the more natural look is in right now, or maybe that's the "Marylander" in me talking. But still, that infomercial is the best and had me laughing the whole way through, mostly in disbelief. And the website is just as good. Under the "Happiology" link, the creator Kelly (signed with a smiley face) calles herself the "Cheif Executive Optimist." I'm feeling happier already. I wonder what gets into people sometimes. All I can say is I wish Kelly luck. I wonder where her biggest sales will be from. Nashville? Utah? Texas?

It can't be

I do not like this one bit.

Infertility Ettiquette

While in my sister's ward last week, I was struck by something during Good News Minute. (That silly phrase makes me shiver as I write it. I think it's actually a ridiculous tradition.) One girl politely announced that she had her court date set to finalize her long-awaited adoption. I was rejoicing for her! There were a few quiet "awes", but they were short-lived when a more vocal, and very pregnant girl announced her induction date set for Tuesday, inviting everyone to bring cookies etc. to the blessed event. There was much laughter and attention brought to this comment. I was a little disappointed. Maybe that ward had already given their congratulations when the adoptive mother received the baby, but every step is huge. Until the court date, that baby could be taken away from them, so I can only imagine the surge of relief they will feel when that is over. I was a little taken aback by that whole scenario, so I thought it would be okay to add this little gold mine of information.

I found this article through a string of blogs, posted originally from RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. It's a great association that I have become quite familiar with over the last few years. I am hesitant to post this article because: 1) Though I think it could be beneficial to most everyone, I don't want my blog to become a poster for infertility, or adoption, even though they consume my thoughts almost 24/7. But I do want to try and focus on my life as it is right now, as opposed to what I wish it would be. And 2) I don't want to make people uncomfortable around me just because they have a normal family. I would hate it if my friends or family felt like they had to hold off on conversations just because I am in the room. After all, it's their life, and the most important thing they are involved in at the moment, so who am I to not let them live it. But in the end, (only some of the time-I'm doing better) I do leave feeling isolated, and annoyed, and even bitter that conversations all lead to labor stories, breast feeding, first words, and passing babies around for everyone to giggle at. (See even now, I'm feeling bad for saying this for fear of hurting feelings.) But I don't mind it mostly because of the fact that I'm not letting anyone feel sorry for me. That's definitely something I don't want. And I know that someday I'll join those conversations as well. Though it will be a difficult transition, since I've been ignoring, uncomfortably enduring, or rolling my eyes (only at certain baby shower games and stuff like that- I don't rolls my eyes and regular, valid conversations), for so long.

But I decided that I myself am not following this infertility etiquette for me, not allowing myself the true attention and courtesy that this trauma deserves. I mean, I don't want extra attention because of it, and I feel almost equally weird when the conversation turns to me and my situation, instead of other peoples' happy families, with me being a minority. (I am starting to sound like such a hard persons to be friends with.) It just makes me feel weird to compromise a conversation with my problems while they probably have much more important things to discuss pertaining to their lives. But I'm finally deciding to take care of myself and let these things be known, even if it might make things weird with those around me. And I also think it's therapeutic for me to itemize the things that are making me so depressed, and feel so much anxiety, instead of just wallowing in despair. So this list is for all of us.

I admit, being subjected to comments that might be hurtful is mostly our own fault for being so open about our situation, but only so much time can pass before you almost explode and have to tell someone. Especially when things like "I wonder when their going have kids" start circulating. You kinda just want to yell that you're working on it. But to prevent that outburst, it's probably best to say it in a composed and professional manner before you get to that point. Which is what we have tried to do.

Well that was a longer introduction than I had anticipated, but when I start talking on the subject, there's no stopping me. So, even though I could tell stories about how everything in this has affected me, here are some parts of the aforementioned article that I feel have hit me the most. But the rest of it is also very true and helpful, so go ahead and follow the RESOLVE link at the top of this post for it's full contents:

Infertility Etiquette

By Vita Alligood

Chances are, you know someone who is struggling with infertility. More than five million people of childbearing age in the United States experience infertility. Yet, as a society, we are woefully uninformed about how to best provide emotional support for our loved ones during this painful time.

Infertility is, indeed, a very painful struggle. The pain is similar to the grief over losing a loved one, but it is unique because it is a recurring grief. When a loved one dies, he isn't coming back. There is no hope that he will come back from the dead. You must work through the stages of grief, accept that you will never see this person again, and move on with your life.

The grief of infertility is not so cut and dry. Infertile people grieve the loss of the baby that they may never know. They grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy's nose and daddy's eyes. But, each month, there is the hope that maybe that baby will be conceived after all. No matter how hard they try to prepare themselves for bad news, they still hope that this month will be different. Then, the bad news comes again, and the grief washes over the infertile couple anew. This process happens month after month, year after year. It is like having a deep cut that keeps getting opened right when it starts to heal.

As the couple moves into infertility treatments, the pain increases while the bank account depletes. Most infertility treatments involve using hormones, which alter the user's moods. (That statement is like calling a lion a cat-my husband would tell you that the side effect is insanity!) The tests are invasive and embarrassing to both parties, and you feel like the doctor has taken over your bedroom. And for all of this discomfort, you pay a lot of money. Infertility treatments are expensive, and most insurance companies do not cover the costs. So, in addition to the pain of not conceiving a baby each month, the couple pays out anywhere from $300 to five figures, depending upon the treatment used. . .

Reaching a resolution can take years, so your infertile loved ones need your emotional support during this journey. Most people don't know what to say, so they wind up saying the wrong thing, which only makes the journey so much harder for their loved ones. Knowing what not to say is half of the battle to providing support.

Don't Minimize the Problem

Failure to conceive a baby is a very painful journey. Infertile couples are surrounded by families with children. These couples watch their friends give birth to two or three children, and they watch those children grow while the couple goes home to the silence of an empty house. These couples see all of the joy that a child brings into someone's life, and they feel the emptiness of not being able to experience the same joy.

Comments like, "Just enjoy being able to sleep late . . . .travel . . etc.," do not offer comfort. Instead, these comments make infertile people feel like you are minimizing their pain. You wouldn't tell somebody whose parent just died to be thankful that he no longer has to buy Father's Day or Mother's Day cards. Losing that one obligation doesn't even begin to compensate for the incredible loss of losing a parent. In the same vein, being able to sleep late or travel does not provide comfort to somebody who desperately wants a child. . .

Don't Offer Unsolicited Opinions If They Are Trying IVF

On the flip side of the coin, don't offer unsolicited advice to your friends who do choose to try IVF. For many couples, IVF is the only way they will ever give birth to a baby. This is a huge decision for them to make, for all of the reasons I outlined above.

If the couple has resolved any ethical issues, don't muddy the waters. IVF is a gray area in many ethical circles, and many of our moral leaders don't yet know how to answer the ethical questions that have arisen from this new technology. If the couple has resolved these issues already, you only make it harder by raising the ethical questions again. Respect their decision, and offer your support. If you can't offer your support due to ethical differences of opinion, then say nothing.

A couple who chooses the IVF route has a hard, expensive road ahead, and they need your support more than ever. The hormones are no cakewalk, and the financial cost is enormous. Your friend would not be going this route if there were an easier way, and the fact that she is willing to endure so much is further proof of how much she truly wants to parent a child. The hormones will make her more emotional, so offer her your support and keep your questions to yourself.

Don't Play Doctor

Once your infertile friends are under a doctor's care, the doctor will run them through numerous tests to determine why they aren't able to conceive. There a numerous reasons that a couple may not be able to conceive. Here are a few of them:

• Blocked fallopian tubes
• Cysts
• Endometriosis
• Low hormone levels
• Low "normal form" sperm count
• Low progesterone level
• Low sperm count
• Low sperm motility
• Thin uterine walls

Infertility is a complicated problem to diagnose, and reading an article or book on infertility will not make you an "expert" on the subject. Let your friends work with their doctor to diagnose and treat the problem. Your friends probably already know more about the causes and solutions of infertility than you will ever know.

You may feel like you are being helpful by reading up on infertility, and there is nothing wrong with learning more about the subject. The problem comes when you try to "play doctor" with your friends. They already have a doctor with years of experience in diagnosing and treating the problem. They need to work with and trust their doctor to treat the problem. You only complicate the issue when you throw out other ideas that you have read about. The doctor knows more about the causes and solutions; let your friends work with their doctor to solve the problem. . .

Don't Gossip About Your Friend's Condition

Infertility treatments are very private and embarrassing, which is why many couples choose to undergo these treatments in secret. Men especially are very sensitive to letting people know about infertility testing, such as sperm counts. Gossiping about infertility is not usually done in a malicious manner. The gossipers are usually well-meaning people who are only trying to find out more about infertility so they can help their loved ones.

Regardless of why you are sharing this information with someone else, it hurts and embarrasses your friend to find out that Madge the bank teller knows what your husband's sperm count is and when your next period is expected. Infertility is something that should be kept as private as your friend wants to keep it. Respect your friend's privacy, and don't share any information that your friend hasn't authorized. . .

Support Their Decision to Stop Treatments

No couple can endure infertility treatments forever. At some point, they will stop. This is an agonizing decision to make, and it involves even more grief. Even if the couple chooses to adopt a baby, they must still first grieve the loss of that baby who would have had mommy's nose and daddy's eyes.

Once the couple has made the decision to stop treatments, support their decision. Don't encourage them to try again, and don't discourage them from adopting, if that is their choice. Once the couple has reached resolution (whether to live without children, adopt a child, or become foster parents), they can finally put that chapter of their lives behind them. Don't try to open that chapter again.


Other topics in the article include:
Don't Tell Them to Relax
Don't Say There Are Worse Things That Could Happen
Don't Say They Aren't Meant to Be Parents
Don't Ask Why They Aren't Trying IVF
Don't Be Crude
Don't Complain About Your Pregnancy
Don't Treat Them Like They Are Ignorant
Don't Push Adoption (Yet)
Let Them Know That You Care
Remember Them on Mother's Day

There you have it. I couldn't have said it better myself, though I have had these thoughts rolling around in my head for years. I happen to be blessed with very caring friends and family that always seem to have my best interest at heart. But we are all human, and all need reminders now and then. In fact, I say dumb things almost everyday, and I'd love it if someone helped me to understand what I can do for them in their individual hardships and trials.

Thanks for enduring again in one of my infertility rants. It's my therapy of choice, I guess, since I can write to my heart's content and no one has to read it. But in case you did, thanks.

Just another manic Monday

I have had a rather productive day today, if I do say so. It was nice to check so many things off my list as the day went on. I think when I have a lot of things to do, it's easier to motivate my self to get the little things done in between because I can't rest yet. So let's make a list:

• It started by leaving my house at about 8:15 am, to go to a doctors appointment in Columbia. Now if you don't know Maryland geography, you wouldn't know that Columbia is a bit of a drive from where I live, so I tried to get as much done in that area as I could. (I used to live there, so it's like a second home to me. I know where everything is, and it's such a nice place to be.)
• Then, lo and behold, a couple of my friends decided to make a trip to the Columbia Mall (a rare thing for them to do), which is, very conveniently right across the street from my doctors office. They called me and asked if I wanted to come along. I told them I already beat them to it. (This mall is one of the best in the area. I happen to be very familiar with it, against KC's wishes.)
• While my friends were making their way, I went to get an oil change. KC made it very simple with a coupon ready for me as I was leaving the house this morning. I plugged the company name into the GPS and found one a few miles away from my dr. There was a shopping center across the street. It's much nicer to peruse some stores instead of waiting inside car shop waiting rooms.
  
• My friends and I met up for lunch and had a good time chatting it up.
  
• We finished just in time for me to get to my appointment with the oral surgeon to talk about these annoying wisdom teeth I still have. Looks like a quadruple extraction is in my near future. Hooray.
• Then I wanted to go see Cami. When I got to her house I was greeted with a very smiley, and chatty Jane, and a nice big slice of d.o.c. dark chocolate cake. It was gooooooood. I stayed for a while, and was able to see the boys as they came home from school. Ethan kept calling me Melody for some strange reason. I mean, he's only hung out with her a handful of times, while I used to live with him. Funny boy. I snacked on some yummy spiral-sliced ham from the fridge, and went on my way.
• While on the freeway, I was stuck in a bout of traffic, which is annoying, but my frown turned upside down when I was inching along next to this Uhaul. Look closely. Yep, that is my mom, Lili, and me advertising for Uhaul. I knew that it existed, but I've never seen it in person. Luckily, my camera was readily available for this momentous occasion.
• I had to make a return at a store that was on my way home. Of course they only gave me store credit, even though their product was defective and it broke after only a few weeks of use. But it was about a week over the 30-day return period, so what do you do. Store credit it better than nothing.
  
• After a little window shopping, I went to my last stop, the library, to return some things, and I was finally on my way home a little after 5 pm.
  

What a day. And it was a gorgeous one at that. I thoroughly enjoyed opening the sunroof and letting the sun pour on me.

Anyway, I usually like to be home a little bit earlier, but I was happy that I got so many things done, so I didn't mind. Anyway, going to Cami's is like being at home, so I felt quite rejuvenated. And I'm realizing now that this post probably makes me sound kind of lazy, and a bit agoraphobic, like leaving the house is a huge deal, when in reality, I do leave quite often, and have plenty to do. But I was just glad I was able to get so many planned/unplanned things out of the way in a low-key, things-just-fell-into-place kind of way.

And the best part is, we are having leftovers for dinner.

Home again.

So I am back in Maryland and am unusually busy! I mean, I like having things to do, but it's hard to believe that I was still in Utah just two days ago. I've been babysitting, cleaning, store-running, and catching up on my church and other responsibilities. But I had the most wonderful time, and loved every second that I had with everybody. It was the kind of trip where we could plan things, or not, or do things, or not, and no matter what, it was fun. It was great to just get to see my family, and act as if we actually lived near each other.

So of course, it wouldn't be a trip without a long, descriptive, day-by-day post, with a plethora a pictures and videos, so here you go.

Sunday 1/25

• Caught a 5 pm flight without a hitch.
• Enjoyed two in-flight movies that really helped the 5 hours pass.
  
• Was picked up by Drew and Dad and was warmly greeted at home by the Rejholecs, Pecks, and Ribeiras.
• Melody, Julia and I slept there are Mom's.
  

Monday 1/26 (My camera had just died and I had to wait until the evening when we went to Melody's the charge it, so no pics, of this day, unless someone else has them on their camera.)

• I finally got to see Jujus when she woke up, and watched in amazement as she fed herself humongous bites of oatmeal.
  
• I accompanied Melody and Julia to Julia's doctor appointment.
  
• We met up with Amber and did some great clearance shopping at Old Navy, and Target, and found sales way too good to pass up (even if I had to get creative when I was packing to go home.)
• At Amber's we enjoyed Cafe Rio for lunch, watched Ghost Town (during which I snoozed a bit), and latest episode of The Office.
• Some other family came over for an old fashioned spaghetti dinner, and a huge plate of doughnuts (hey, we had a craving).
• I went home with the Rejholecs to stay the night. This was my usual sleeping place, though I moved around quite a bit.

Tuesday1/27

• I joined Melody and Julia on the routine track walk.
• While Melody was teaching preschool, I went to get my haircut in Amber's neighbor's house. She did a great job, and it as half the price of my Maryland stylist (who I love and deserves every penny, but still.)
• Dad came to pick me up because I was sleeping at there house. Mom made a great dinner of soup and salad.
• Mom and I had a night of pampering. We started with some yoga, did facials, our eyebrows, and highlighted her hair.
  
• We rounded out the night with a much-needed trip to Purple Turtle with Lili, Jeff, their hat, and Drew. I was in Heaven. They don't make shakes like that where I come from.

(Here is a little video of one of Todd's masterpieces.)


Wednesday 1/28

• Went to BYU with Mom, Dad, and Drew.
• Saw mother-in-law Janice at her office on campus.
• Caught up with Drew between classes while we shopped at the bookstore, had bagels in the Wilk. and saw the new exhibits in the art museum.
• Ate lunch with mom and dad in the cafe of the Art Museum
• When we got home, I showed mom and dad how I relax in the afternoon with a couple episodes of SVU. I think mom is hooked.
• Went to a wonderful and delicious pizza party at the Robinson's with lots of family. We even had a webcam visit with KC. You really need to try out these pizzas. They were awesome.
• Kristy, my childhood neighbor, turned cousin-in-law, lives right by melody, so she offered to take me home. My parents were thankful for the hour less driving. Thanks again Kristy!
  

Thursday 1/29

• Melody and I, after sharing and enjoying a Maverick biscuit sandwich, met dad and went up to Salt Lake to see my grandpa where he was having chemotherapy. We were able to visit for a good amount of time before we had to go back in time for preschool.
• We had awesome Japanese food for lunch at the Pecks.
  
• I was able to catch up on LOST while Mel was teaching. What is up with that show?
• Later when Jonny came, home we weren't really hungry, so Melody and I had cereal for dinner, and then we watched American Idol. We also played a little Wakee Six. We may have tried to watch Bleak House, but promptly fell asleep. This happened on a few occasions.
  

(Enjoy Julia's animal sounds. The bunny kills me.)

Friday 1/30

• We met up with Matt, Jonny, and the some of the Pecks for breakfast at Kneaders. Whoa, it's so good.
• We girls did more shopping, and found more awesome deals. And we went to Costco.
  
• We relaxed in the Pecks theater room while we watched The Forgotten.
• Amber made her awesome stuffed mushrooms that we snacked on while we played games.
  
• Mostly everyone came over for biscuits and gravy that we prepared at the pecks.
• Mom, Dad and I picked up Cami from the airport and drove straight up to Logan for more time with Grandma and Grandpa. They were already asleep when we got there.
  
• I was REALLY missing KC by this point, but it helped that my dad tucked me in like old times.
  

Saturday 1/31

• We had a great day morning in Logan spending quality time with two of my favorite people. I loved cuddling with my grandma on a chair as we tried to warm up in the morning
  
• Grandma gave us a few chores to do. She needed a little r&r with all that she does for Grandpa. We were more than happy to oblige.
  
• Their house has such a wealth of memories for me. It was so refreshing to be up there.
  
• After a wonderful lunch of hot soup and bread, we headed home.
• We met up with EVERYBODY (that is a lot of people) at 5 Guys-one of our faves here in the East, and new to those in the west-and indulged in burgers and fries.
  
• I went home with the Rejholecs, and watched Vantage Point. (Which I slept through completely. This time change, I'm telling you.)

(This is a trick Melody and Jonny taught Julia-to pretend they are asleep so she kiss them.)

(I learned this trick my resting my eyes, and opening them to Julia's puckered lips. I was so happy she did it again for the video.)

Sunday 2/1

• I attended Church with the Rejholecs. I got some new ideas for Young Women, and had a nice chat with one of the YW counselors (Mel is Pres.) about her recent adoption.
  
• We met at my moms for delicious dutch oven fajitas, where everyone, again, was in attendance.
• We went on a vigorous two mile walk to Matt and Courtney's house, in the freezing, though, refreshing air.
• We speed watched the Superbowl.
• We played this fun game called Who What Where, and ate way too much caramel popcorn. (I did anyway.)
  
• Someone broke out the 5 lb. bag of gummi bears (that house never seems to be without it) and we watched (in horror) the Office special. Whoa, that was an uncomfortable episode.
  
• We just sat around and talked well into the night, while mom, wrapped in a fitted sheet because it felt warm out of the dryer, was doing her homework. Melody, and Amber slept over. We were only missing Elise for our girly sleepover. Bummer.

Monday 2/2

• Amber, Cami, Melody and I went to breakfast where Mel treated me to her favorite Gandalfos breakfast sandwich. She was right, it was good.
• A little more shopping, and then Melody and I left for her house. We really needed a nap. Of course, Julia didn't need a very long one, but I enjoyed lounging with her on the couch as she quietly watched her shows, and I rested my eyes.
  
• We went to get some groceries for the coming dessert night.
  
• We did a little work on the desserts, and then had a delicious dinner that Melody and Jonny made.
  
• Melody and I went out for dip cones at Arctic Circle, where we made come fun plans coming up.

Tuesday 2/3

• In the morning we made a little more progress on the desserts, and left for preschool. I picked Cami up and we went to Grandmother's for lunch. My dad came along too. It was delicious. I've always loved my grandmother's southern cooking.
  
• Cami and Dad left for Jane's nap time, and I got to stay and visit for quite a while. It was so fun to catch up and chat.
  
• I stopped at Target and ran into one of my best friends ever, Ashley. What are the chances? Great timing, I say.
• After preschool, Melody and I went back to her place to get ready for the pizza, dessert party that the whole fame came to. We make Macaroon Mousse Cake, and deep dish Key Lime Pie. We all enjoyed ourselves, and I was feeling sad that this would be the last time I saw all of these people for a while (hence the millions of pictures).

(The family get-together.)


(Julia is learning to jump, and like a doggy doing a trick, she gets a treat.)

Wednesday 2/4

• I had to say goodbye to Melody and Julia, which is a very, very, VERY hard thing to do. I didn't like it.
  
• Jonny drove me to the park-and-ride, where we were meeting Dad and Cami to go to the airport. On the way, we derived a 5-year plan for our families. Hmm. . .maybe I'll be in the west pretty soon.
• Cami and had I a pretty uneventful flight. Janey was great considering annoying traveling conditions. And we had another in-flight movie. I love those.
  
• My love picked us up. I was so happy to be reunited with him.
• We dropped Cami off, went home and vegged. I was completely exhausted. What a trip.

So, that's it. There were some things that didn't make it into the daily details, but I'll mention them here:

• I loved hearing Julia's new words. She learned "Mimi" while I was there, and it really melts my heart to hear her say it as she points to me and smiles. It was is also hilarious (but naughty, so I tried not to laugh) when she would say "no" in so many different ways, and "STOP!" even when you weren't even doing anything. I also loved when she would come in my room and help me with my hair, play with my jewelry, or help me pack. I loved getting up early and getting her out of bed. She is so funny and talkative right out of bed. And I couldn't get enough of her kisses. I'll miss you like crazy, Jujus.
• All the Peck kids have changed so much. Allyson still has her little pixie voice, but she is getting older so fast. Jillian has become this hilarious drama queen, and puts on quite a show. Katy, is practically a teenager, and is so smart, telling us stories about how she sticks up for her political beliefs in class. And Jordan, he IS a teenager. I can't believe how grown up and mature he is with all his responsibilities. I keep waiting for him to act like a brat, as teenagers do, but he never does. I love those kids.
  
• Mom was always either in class, or doing homework. She is such an amazing student. I'm sure she works harder than she needs to. I'm so impressed.

There is so much more I could write, but my legs are numb from sitting here too long, and I doubt many are still reading. So now it's back to life, responsibilities, and most importantly, KC. It's always a bittersweet experience when I leave. I was really missing KC when my trip was nearing the end, but every time I looked at little Julia, or any of the kids, it made me so sad to know that I wouldn't have the luxury of seeing them everyday and watch them grow. The kids are always the hardest to leave because the change the most, and I don't talk to them on the phone everyday. Although, Melody and I are going to try to get some regular webcaming going on, so Julia will continue to know her aunt "Mimi." Thanks to everyone for letting me disrupt your lives and letting me stay with you. I always feel like I'm whole again when Melody is with me. It just makes me happy to be with her and the rest of my family. Now, if only KC had just been there to make it compete. Well, we have plans for a summer trip, so I am definitely looking forward to that. Until then, enjoy a few more videos. The last one if my absolute favorite. (Oh and Cami posted some great pics of Logan, and other family gatherings here, if you hadn't had enough yet.)

(This is Julia's language.)



( I really couldn't get enough of this little girl.)



(It makes me laugh out loud every time I watch it.)

It makes no difference

if you stay up into the late hours when you are in a different time zone. You will (at least I will) still wake you at your normal time (actually a bit earlier than my current normal time-I have actually been sleeping until about 7-7:30 at home) when you are on vacation. So, for me that was 4:47 am when I went to bed around midnight, all Utah time. I am still exhausted, and my eyes would still like to be closed, but my brain is going strong. So for the past couple hours I've been watching tv, reading blogs, etc. Thank heavens for the internet when you are an early bird in an earlier time zone. And I don't really see anyone waking up anytime soon. Maybe Julia will be a dear and wake up to keep me company. I could always read my book, or hang out with my friends from SVU.

On another note, it's so fun to be with the fam! They were so funny and all crowded around the door to scream at me when I walked in. They really know how to make a visitor feel special. I can't wait for the days to come. KC, in an effort to feel more a part of this trip, has asked me to do something for him. K.C.Q.D. -that is KC's daily question. He has asked that I try to ask a question that I might hear him ask someone, so that when we talk, he'll be able to get the answer that he might get. He really does ask questions a certain way, so I tried it yesterday, and it worked. I am learning new and different things. We'll see what answers the other questions hold.

You've had a birthday, shout HOORAY!

That's right, KC turned 32 this past Wednesday. We kept it low key this year, with just the two if us. Partly because KC came down with a mild cold-type thing, and we were pretty busy with babysitting/work during the day and mutual/p.p.i at the church in the evening. We tried to celebrate in any spare moment. We started with breakfast in the morning. In my family we have a tradition of picking out your very favorite box(es) of cereal on your birthday. But since that is what KC has for breakfast everyday, I decided to make him Hootenannies (German pancakes) for something different. We don't have then nearly as often as we'd like (due to their fat content, and because I just don't think about it), so this was an easy and festive thing to have together quickly before he had to rush off to work, sniffles and all.
During the day Iris, donned with the princess gear I bought for her visits, and I had some fun making birthday cards. I also set up his birthday present from me. I figured it was about time we had a guitar floating around this house. It is how he proposed after all. I can't wait to hear some guitar playing around here. I even like picking it up now and then to play around with my four known chords. KC said he'd teach me more.
When I asked him what he'd like me to make him for dinner, he really couldn't choose. He has so many faves. So I decided to go traditional. He came home to a good old steak dinner, complete with mushroom, red wine sauce (he loooooooves mushrooms), slow roasted baked potatoes with everything, and sauteed green beans. I figured I couldn't go wrong with that. We enjoyed the food and the guitar in the few minutes we had before rushing to the church for our evening obligations. We had planned on coming home and eating cake, but with KC not feeling so hot, and me being exhausted, we decided to save it for tomorrow and watch LOST, during which we fell asleep.
On Thursday, we did get the cake out, light a candle, and sing Happy Birthday (birthdays seem to go on for days sometimes, don't they?)He even got to open more presents that came in the mail. The flourless, cinnamon spiced-chocolate cake topped with fresh whipped cream, was so rich, we could only eat a very small fraction between the two of us. It was seriously hard to swallow after a couple bites. I took about half of it to my book group later that night, but KC will have quite a task of finishing this while I'm gone. Maybe I'll freeze it for later.
And don't worry, we still have more birthday plans to come this weekend. I love celebrating with KC. He is constantly making me happy, so it's the least I can do to make his birthday as fun/drawn out as possible. Seeing him happy is truly a wonderful sight. I just love the guy.

Like I said, I am leaving this weekend for a 10-day trip to Utah without my honey. I am super excited to see family and friends, but get a little pit in my stomach when I think about being without him for that long. We've done it before, last summer, so I know we'll survive, and even have fun, but I also know I'll miss him like crazy. But never fear, we have webcams galore to communicate, and that will help a lot. We realized this is the 5th birthday of his that we have celebrated together, 3rd as a married couple. And I have made the cakes for all of them. Crazy how time flies. I can't wait for more birthdays to come.

And for your enjoyment (and since I finally have a scanner), and thought I'd add this little treasure to commemorate this day of his birth. His parents gave us a binder of all his school pictures. This was in the front. I could look at it for hours, but I try not to because it makes me cry a little. I mean, look at those dimples. Happy birthday honey!

I really need to remember to allow for cooling time when transporting food.

Right out of the oven, this Pomegranate Lemon Tart with an Almond crust was like bubbling lava while I was driving to my destination. Needless to say, I didn't make it one block before it had spilled over the edge, and I was taking it back home.


Before:
After: (Hey, I had to make sure it still tasted good.)

What is wrong with me? In my defense, it was a last minute idea, and I was being ambitious. Next time I'll know better. I suppose it's okay to buy dessert every now and then.

By the way

"Dear KC and Emily:

We are pleased to inform you that out Adoption Committee met and reviewed you file and confirm your paperwork complete and ready for placement of a child with you family as of January 12, 2009. . ."

I suppose I should share this bit of good news with my blogging buddies. KC and I have officially been approved by LDS Family services. Yes, they seem to think we will be good parents, when the opportunity arises. The approval process, though long and tedious, was a bit quicker than I had imagined, being told many different stories. We are thrilled to have completed this fairly difficult step, but are aware that many more steps lay ahead of us. It's a bit anticlimactic, I suppose, but a relief to be done with all the paperwork, nonetheless.

The weird thing is, someone could pick us any day at this point. Not that I expect it to happen any time soon, but we are pretty close in the long scheme of things. I still have some plans to get our name out there a bit more to get this party started sooner, but at least we can let the agency do their part now, while we do ours. With all the forces working together, the Lord included, this is bound to go somewhere.

They say that waiting in the hardest part. Probably because the lack of control you have in this part of the process. Even though "waiting" and "lack of control" and I have gotten to know each other very well over the past few years, I still find it quite annoying, especially with my micromanagey tendencies. If I think about it too much, I get all scatterbrained, become overstimulated with thoughts, and go somewhat crazy. So I'm doing what I can to stay sane during this exciting/anxious time, and trying to enjoy this kid-less stage while it lasts.

Our profile is available to view on the LDSFS website, but in a week there will be a fully renovated, new and beautiful website that they have been working extremely hard on and that they are all really excited about. So I'll wait until then to show you around.

In other good news, I'm feeling a million times better than I did during my last post. Thank you meds! I was able to sleep more than 4 hours last night for the first time in days, and without waking up gasping for air. I'm very glad I got it over-with before my trip to Utah this weekend. Here's to a trip that is free from any sickness, or trips to the ER (knock on wood).

"I suddenly have a headache of phenomenal dimension."

If I have to have a sinus infection (the achy skin and joints, dry mouth and lips, sore throat, can't- get-up-without-a-pounding-headache kind) then at least I have Cranford, my large bottle of lemon water, and antibiotics (thankfully my doctor was able to get me in this morning, and have the meds on hand so I didn't have to wait at the pharmacy) to keep me company. I hate that I had to slack on my church and babysitting responsibilities, among other things, but I wouldn't want to expose anyone to these agonizing symptoms. I can't wait to breath out of my nose again.

In case you were wondering the title is a line from Cranford itself. Though, the tragedy that happened following that line in the movie, will hopefully not be my fate. If it didn't hurt to do so, I'd be having quite a chuckle at this show. It's always so funny to observe what was inappropriate, frivolous, or extravagant back then. I know that the reason we girls love period pieces such as this is so that we can live vicariously through these women as they get dressed into their amazing gowns, and dance those charming choreographed dances with those beyond handsome men. But seriously, their pastimes of knitting, impressing people, and most of all, gossiping, might get old after a couple days. And beside, I can have ice cream whenever I want, whereas they have to wait for a fancy garden party to have any. Of course, there is something nice about being so thankful for something as simple as an orange, or precious lace, but I am happy with the "extravagances" I am able to enjoy by not living in that time period. Yes, our society is far more inappropriate now, as opposed to then. That is something I wish hadn't changed.

Anyway, like a said, it had provided me with hours of mindless, light-hearted entertainment as I recover from this nasty illness. I couldn't have timed our Netflix queue better.

Boo. . .

. . .on bikini girl and her terrible voice on American Idol last night. Also, why do some people move their faces so weirdly when they sing? She did that too.

I just forgot what I was about to say.

I have used this statement several times in the last couple days. And it doesn't stop at forgetting things I want to say, but things I want to do also. This is very, very unlike me. I like to do things the moment I think of them and if I can't, I make a list, sometimes more than one a day, of things do to, because I know if I don't get to it at that moment, I might forget. Sometimes when I'm on the computer, I remember things I want to look at, or read, etc, so I have several tabs open just to remind me to go back to those others when I'm done with the one I am on (for instance, right now I have Netflix, Craigslist, LDS Family Services, Hotmail, Costco, and blogger all open).

While I try to remember what it was that I was going to say or do, I can't think of anything else until the thought is recovered, even if it was just a silly conversation with a friend (and it was better that I forgot anyway because I was talking to much already). But still, I hate that I can't remember. It's never that important, obviously, or else I don't think it would be forgotten so easily, but it's just not like me. I feel like, and I have seriously considered, carrying around a note pad and a pen in my pocket (I already try to keep some in my purse and car)to jot things down as they come to me. So this forgetting frustrates me to no end, and I am wondering what the cause of this sudden brain freeze is.

Recent events in my life have required my complete and total attention, having important tasks every single day. Forgetting one would be bad. So with me being between those all consuming events (for now anyway), maybe my brain is liking this monotone state a little too much. Maybe it was used to needing to remember things, that it's still in the mode of "remember or die", but now tries to remember less critical things. But I still get a panicky feeling if I forget, because that is what I would've done in times past.

I think the actual forgetting makes me more annoyed that doing or saying what I forgot. I guess I need to get my sudoku out again, or work on some brain exercise or some sort. I think this post was more a vent, than anything else.

On the town

(Dark pictures will be explained further down.) We don't go on many formal dates. With just the two of us together all the time, it's hard to find an excuse for a night on the town, especially when it's cold. Yeah, we do the occasional I -don't-feel like-cooking-so-let's-go-to-5 Guys nights, but it's not quite the same as marking it on the calendar and telling people you are busy that night with a prior engagement, that being a date. And thanks to a little push from a gift certificate from some friends that have since moved, we made our way to DC to eat a lovely dinner at a darling, quaint, French restaurant named Montmartre. It was surprisingly quick drive (less that 15 minutes), near Eastern Market, and had ample (FREE) street parking. I think we'll be making our way to this part of town, more often. Parking is my least favorite part of driving into the city, so the fact that it was this easy, made for an even more pleasant evening than we expected.

The food was absolutely delicious (my Kobe steak being cooked to a perfect medium, and KC's rabbit on a bed of linguine melting in my mouth) and the selection of French desserts took me back to my training at school. It was way too hard for me to choose, so I let KC. He opted for the Frangipane tart loaded with fresh berries, in a pool of creme anglaise and raspberry sauce. Good choice. It was a lovely night, with my lovely husband. It was nice to chat about things that might not so easily come up in regular conversation while moseying around at home. Things that are known, but not always vocalized. We really need to do this more often. You know, formally.

I was trying out a new little prize I got myself, and while trying to be inconspicuous in a nice restaurant, I didn't want to use the flash. So I know I wasn't using it to it's full potential, but it's nice to have a pocket camera again, nonetheless. The one time I did accidentally use the flash, I felt silly, but am now glad to have the picture of my delicious meal. Isn't it funny how mainstream taking pictures of food is?

And of course, one of the best things about getting ready and getting out, is coming home, putting on your most comfortable clothes, and being warm under your wonderfully cozy electric blanket. At least it is for me.

Does everyone have a list like this?

You'd think that when Christmas is all said and done, you feel fulfilled when it comes to things you want/need for the time being, and don't need to purchase anything significant for quite a while. So why is it that my list of things to buy lately is even bigger and better than it was before the holiday? I guess when you are in a mode of buying cool things, it's hard to shake. I know I'm not actually going to buy all of the things on my list right now, but I just keep finding myself saying to myself, "That would be really convenient right now," or "I'm just going to pull the trigger and get that." Then I talk myself out of it, feeling like a spoiled brat, and remembering we have much more important things to save for/spend on. And with KC's birthday around the corner, I should be thinking about what he wants and needs (and I already know what that is-he he). Although the things on our list are things we could both enjoy, but I want him to be surprised.

But still, a lot of things can be justified, like a new lens and flash for our camera to prepare for, ahem, upcoming events, or a new vacuum since ours is on it's last leg (we bought a cheap one to start with, and we won't make that mistake again). But still, we could go one living without any of the things on our list just fine. I don't want to be a never-satisfied type person, but with what the world has to offer, it's hard to stop dreaming. Why not make life more comfortable? I know people on both ends of the spending spectrum. Some that don't buy anything, and I mean anything, extra. They just make due. There's hardly a desire to buy any more than the bare minimum they have. And then there are the people that seriously wouldn't be okay without the latest and greatest of what is out there. I'm wondering where I am, and where I want to be. Middle of the road is fine with me, but is my idea of being in between skewed? I mean, I have plenty of unnecessary luxuries, just not the best of the best, or the bells and whistles that go with it. So do I really have it all, and I just act like I always want more because there is more out there?

I am incredibly grateful for what we have, that is the truth. I know things aren't what's important, boy do I know that, and maybe I'm just trying to make up for what I'm lacking at the moment. But I will still admit, just like everyone else, that it's fun to have the things that make life more convenient and enjoyable.

So for now, my answer to all my wondering and wanting is my Amazon wish list.

Of course, some things on the list are not practical, or realistic. Of course, I could add things to it, until the cows come home, but I just add things when I've thought about them time and time again. A few of them are the "best" of the actual item that we would buy in reality (should that ever happen),but that's what wish lists are for, right? Some might actually save us money in the long run if we just went ahead and bought them. But at least the list is created to get the items off my mind and are in a place to refer to them when we are ready and prepared for our next big purchase. KC tells me to start a little "kitty" for myself (i.e. stop buying clothes even if they are on sale), and when I've saved up enough, go ahead and get one of my "fun" things. It's a good idea, and I have the self control to do it, it just comes back down to wondering what kind of person I am. You know, I should really start to think about the major purchases we'll have to buy in the (hopefully) near future pertaining to our little addition.

KC is a master at finances (and he is trying to teach me) and we totally agree with each other on this subject. So until we make any big decisions, we will continue to be smart as far as our wants and needs, and maybe surprise ourselves with a little prize now and then. Money is for spending, right?

Interesting

Here's something random. I was just browsing through my live traffic feed like I sometimes do, and found that someone had arrived on our blog from CheverlyCommunityMarket.com. Slightly confused, because I usually only see people arrive from familiar blogs, and the occasional person googling Cookie Monster Sings Chocolate Rain on You Tube (yes, we still get a few hits a day on that one). So I went to the source to search where the link to my blog is. Sure enough, on their about page, on the In the News and on the Web section, they had a link to my post when I had attended the market. I guess they google around now and then to see what testimonials they come up with. I actually gave a pretty good one (unknowingly) describing the beautiful neighborhood, the great selection of what they sell, and the crowds that were present, so I can see why they'd want to use it. Funny how blogs really put you out there more than you know it.

But here's the thing.

A while ago, I'm sure you noticed that I went ahead and took my last name from our blog, like many other fellow bloggers, in an effort to protect our family the best we could without going private. And with our adoption nearing, we need our name protected for that as well. So, I wrote the Cheverly market people, and told them I would be happy to provide my testimonial, as long as they changed the link, not provideing my last name. And I suppose it's time to ask you all to do that same. I've never liked it when blogs go private (though I understand why people do), and I'd like to keep mine as open as I can (I kind of like the random comments, and visitors), but I know times are changing, and I feel, and our adoption agency has reccommended, that we try to keep really personal information to a minimum. The Cheverly website is not a dangerous place, by any means, but it just reminded me of just how easy it is to access anything on the web. Crazy.

So, if our last name appears on your link list, or anything like that, could you simply remove it to show just our first names? Thanks friends. And, you might want to google your blog from time to time and see just where you have ended up.

Highlight, Low-light

We rang quietly in to the new year, just like last year (except KC wasn't throwing up this year, thank goodness). The whole week has been pretty quiet actually. Let's see if I can recall the happenings.

Last Friday, like I mentioned, we were Mary and Joseph at the DC Temple Visitor Center. KC was also helping direct Traffic until it was our turn in the manger. It was very similar to when we did it a couple years ago, but we had a few new moves thrown at us. We had a fun time doing our little set of actions continuously for about an hour. And the lights were amazing of course. I helped with a tree or two during a youth service project. There were thousands of people there. nice music, and a beautiful photography display. It was a great way to end our Christmas season. The weekend was relatively normal. I took advantage of the outrageous Target clearances (but not too much, just a few things I've been keeping my eye on) We saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, and loved it. It's high time there were some good movies to see. On Sunday we were invited to dinner by one of KC's college buddies that was in town with his in-laws. It was fun to catch up with them,

Monday I did some returning/buying more-than-I-should, at the mall. Hey, I found some great deals. What was I supposed to do? And I did some babysitting that night. The kids were very excited to show me their new toys. KC was also excited-to play with the toys.

Tuesday I did some more shopping (I didn't find everything on my list before, and I was finally successful). Then the kids came to my house so their parents could do some work on their house. Iris was elated to be able to take her nap in my bed. She had everything she needed from the white noise machine, to specific books she liked. She asked me to close the blinds, and asked if she could use my blanket too (it was actually my bathrobe, but it's the same material as her blankie). We read a story together and she was out like a light for over 2 hours. I loved laying there with sweet Iris. Such a cuddly girl. Wade couldn't stop watching The Muppet Show DVDs KC's parents gave us for Christmas. They were right up his ally, and I had a good time watching them too.
Wednesday, the kids came over again for a few more hours while the work on the house was getting done. We made cookies, ordered pizza, and of course, watched more Muppets. It was a very blustery day outside, so it was fun to hang inside with the kids. They loved picking which apron, out of the many that I have, to wear while we baked. They looked so cute, and the cookies were quite good.
That night, being New Years Eve, we were wondering what to do. Join some friends, call the Turpins, go out for dinner, or go see a movie (yeah we are real party animals). . . But instead of deciding, we did none of the above, made some nachos, and watched our latest Netflix, Ghost Town. I fell asleep a good 15 minutes into it, around 10 or maybe earlier, and slept through any ball-dropping at the stroke of midnight. But that's they way I like it anway. I'm no fun to be around when I'm tired. And I was plenty tired.

I woke up and made breakfast. I copied Melody's tradition again, and made crepes. I like this tradition. We love crepes, but don't think to make them on any regular days, so this is a great occasion to get my crepe maker out. I made pomegranate curd, and layered it on the crepes with sectioned clementines, and freshly whipped cream. It was a great, and rich way to start the day. Now I have to figure out what to do with the rest of the pomegranate curd. I'll post the recipe on EE soon. It's a fun way to use up any stray pomegranates you have lying around. After breakfast, we slowly got ready, after I finished watching (and loving) Ghost Town, and went to do some window shopping, see a movie, and afterward get a burger at Five Guys. Seriously, nothing can compete with those burgers and fries. On our drive home, we took my mom's advice and play a game, Highlight, Low-light, hence the title of this post. You take turns each saying a highlight of the year, and then do the same with a low-light. There are some times this past year that I'd rather not revisit, but there were times that I wouln't trade for anything. It was a good way to reflect on our good times, and what we learned, and how far we've come from the bad. The rest of the night we spent relaxing, and watching a couple BBC Office episodes.

See, nothing too special about our New Year celebration, or our whole holiday season for that matter, but I loved the low key feeling we maintained through it all. It feels like forever since Christmas, though it was only a week ago. Maybe it seems so long because we took down everything Christmas related the morning after Christmas day. The space under the tree was depressing with it's lack of colorful gifts, and the accumulation of stray needles. I couldn't stand to look at it any longer. And besides, that tree was DEAD. I think our vacuum broke in the process of cleaning up this mess.I love the freshness and rejuvenation that a new year brings. Putting away the holiday decor is, to me, kind of a metaphor for the new year. Put everything in storage, clean all the nooks a crannies, and get ready for a fresh start. The house feels more open, clean, and relaxed, just like my mind, body and soul. I can feel that this will be the year of changes for us. And yeah, we're ready.